I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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