I just threw up on my dentist
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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