Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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