She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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