I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
accomplished twins. life is a go
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
