From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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