Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
