do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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