Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
