sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Randomize
