We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Two words: blizzard sex
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize