Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
