I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Randomize
