I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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