I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
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