My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize