My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize