i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
