Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
