Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize
