Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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