Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
