Did you just see the Batmobile???
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize
