she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
