My hand turned me down
babies were throwing up all over the place
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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