Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
