So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
