The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
