Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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