Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
