I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
