im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I'm sobbing to NWA
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
