he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Little spoons don't ask big questions
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Randomize
