just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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