Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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