wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
he laminated a picture of his dick.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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