I need help removing her.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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