So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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