We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
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