Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
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