She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I think people are normalizing furries
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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