Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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