did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize