you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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