I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Randomize