Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
