If that was your dad, he is hot
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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