she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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