I think my fart just growled at me.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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