You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
