There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
