no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Randomize
